


After the Prince Falls

by the_cats_pyjamas



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Can Be Read As Romantic, M/M, Post-Episode: Putting Others First - Selfishness v. Selflessness Redux | Sanders Sides, Prinxiety - Freeform, Roman is not okay, Self-Hatred, Spoilers for Episode: Putting Others First - Selfishness v. Selflessness Redux | Sanders Sides, Suicidal Thoughts, platonic or pre-romantic prinxiety, thoughts of ducking out
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-15
Updated: 2020-05-15
Packaged: 2021-03-03 05:14:16
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,209
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24189481
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/the_cats_pyjamas/pseuds/the_cats_pyjamas
Summary: Set after POF. Roman falls apart, and Virgil is there to help pick up the pieces.Small part based off of this post - https://today-only-happens-once.tumblr.com/post/617150396623912960/dont-think-about-roman-mentioning-quietly-to
Relationships: Anxiety | Virgil Sanders & Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders, Anxiety | Virgil Sanders/Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders
Comments: 15
Kudos: 96





	After the Prince Falls

Roman sunk out, fighting back the tears threatening to come forth. The words stupid, useless, evil, pathetic kept repeating in his head like some sort of sick mantra. Focussing on the ground in front of him, Roman headed in the direction of his room, trying in hardest not to cry. He opened the door and flung himself onto the queen-sized bed, and all of the tears that he had fought to keep back came forward in a massive flood. He hugged a pillow close to his chest, shoulders shaking violently, all of his insecurities pressing down on him like a massive weight. Stupid, unoriginal, worthless, mean, evil, pathetic, unworthy, unlovable, hopeless, selfish, burden. He had tried so hard to do what he thought was right, to do what he could, but it was all in vain. Thomas was hurt because of him. Nothing that he ever did was good enough. He was everything he never wanted to be. Maybe he should just leave. The others wouldn’t miss him. All he ever did was bring them down. 

A knock sounded on the door, interrupting the barrage of thoughts going through Roman’s head. He quickly tried to hide the fact that he was crying. No one needed to know how much of a mess he was. “Roman? You in there?” Of course it had to be Virgil. Roman stayed quiet, hoping he would go away if he thought no one was there. “Roman, are you alright?” Virgil asked. “I’m coming in.” Roman furiously wiped his eyes, hoping that Virgil wouldn’t notice how red they were. 

Roman looked up as Virgil entered. “Hey, Ro, you alright? I heard you crying.” Virgil said gently. Come on Roman, act happy, you’re an actor, this is what you do, Roman thought to himself. 

“Crying? No, you must be mistaken. I’m perfectly fine,” Roman said hurriedly, plastering a smile to his face. Good job Roman, now he knows what a pathetic mess you are. “Are you sure? You don’t look fine.” 

“Perfectly sure. Was there any other reason for your visit?”

“Yeah. How’d the video go?” Shit. Roman fought to keep looking at Virgil, and desperately tried to repress the overwhelming feeling of self-hatred. Stupid, worthless, unoriginal, idiot. He took a deep breath and slowly recounted the video the best that he could. He was so concentrated on not falling apart that he barely registered the gentle look of concern on Virgil’s face, nor that the emo had sat down next to him. He was so focused on not feeling that he didn’t notice the tears slipping down his cheeks, or that he was no longer smiling.

Roman told Virgil everything, how he had fucked up, how he had done everything he could, how no matter how hard he tried to do what he thought was right, no matter what he did, it was never good enough, never right. He told Virgil everything that had been eating at him, every little insecurity, because it felt so good to finally tell someone, to be listened to. It felt like the gates had opened, and now all of the thoughts he had been bottling up were spilling out, almost uncontrollably. 

Virgil listened silently. He was completely outraged when he heard about Janus, but he kept his reaction to himself, because Roman was clearly hurting, and now wasn’t the time. When Roman was finally done, he pulled the prince into a hug and held him as he cried into his chest. Roman clung to him, smelling in his scent, burying his head into Virgil’s shirt and wondering all the while what he had done to deserve any of this. He didn’t deserve for anyone to be kind to him, to offer any kind of comfort. He was worthless, stupid and unoriginal. They would be better off without him. 

“Virgil,” Roman whispered, once he had stopped crying.   
“Yeah?”  
“How did you duck out?” 

Whatever Virgil had expected it wasn’t that. His heart shattered. "I already tried that, remember? Can't go copying me,” Virgil said jokingly, trying to distract from how worried he was for Roman.  
Roman’s face fell instantly, and Virgil knew he had fucked up. “Wow, guess I can’t even be original anymore,” Roman mumbled, his voice wavering. 

“Roman, promise me you won’t duck out?” Virgil asked gently, holding the prince close to his chest. Roman didn’t respond. “Roman, please don’t duck out. You are worth so much. You are amazing and original and unique, and I see how much you try and care. You don’t always do the right thing, but your intentions are right, and you always apologise. You are so clever and amazing, and we all love you so much. I love you Roman, and I know how hard it can be, but I will be by your side. Just stay with us, Roman. Please.”

Roman lifted his head from Virgil’s chest and looked into Virgil’s eyes. “Do you really mean it?” he asked. Virgil’s heart twisted at how broken he looked, his eyes red and his hair all messed up. “I promise I mean every word. Now, promise me you won’t duck out.”

Roman was silent for a moment as if he was weighing up his options. He opened his mouth to say something but was stopped by a knock at the door.   
“Roman? You in there kiddo?” 

Roman immediately buried his head back into Virgil’s shirt, and Virgil felt a surge of anger at hearing Patton’s voice. He had accepted Janus and had hurt Roman in the process. “Not now Patton. Go away.” Virgil said. He sounded harsher than he intended, but Patton had hurt Roman, and that was the only thing that mattered at the moment. He heard Patton leave, then he turned his attention to the prince in his arms.

“Ro, you alright there?” Roman lifted his head slowly, a couple of tears were slowly running down his cheeks. “Hey,” Virgil said gently, lifting his hand to wipe away the tears. Roman smiled slightly at the gesture. “Thank you, Virgil,” Roman whispered. “I really don’t deserve any of this.”

“Nonsense,” Virgil said, struggling to stay calm. Roman needed to see how much he was wanted and worthy of staying. “You deserve all the love and support. I promise that no matter how hard it gets, I will always be here. And I promise that no matter how difficult it becomes, no matter how much impossible it seems, things will get better. Just keep fighting Roman. It will get better.”

“That’s nice,” Roman mumbled, but he seemed a lot calmer. He lay his head on Virgil’s shoulder and felt the emo’s arm tighten around him. They stayed like that for a while, before a soft snore alerted Virgil that Roman had fallen asleep. Virgil gently shifted until he was in a position to gently lay Roman down on the bed. He snapped the prince into more comfortable clothes and pulled the covers over him. He was just about to leave when he felt Roman grab his hand to stop him. Virgil looked down fondly at the prince, before settling himself on the bed. “Stay,” Roman murmured sleepily. 

“Always,” Virgil replied. Everything else could wait. For now, all Roman had to do was rest.

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first piece of writing that I have finished and posted!! Thought I would try and add to the Roman angst train. The poor boy is not okay. Comments are greatly appreciated :)


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